Hello all! This is Angel again – now 15 weeks along in this surrogacy pregnancy journey that I’m on! I’m FINALLY in the second trimester… Hallelujah! I don’t know why it felt like it took 25 weeks to get to the second trimester but I will say that the past several weeks have flown by. I’ve been keeping busy with my three full time jobs – one as a social worker, another as a mommy to a toddler and the last as a surrogate, i.e. protector of baby – so that might have something to do with it.
I know I will probably be hated for saying this (sorry ladies!) but I’ve felt great throughout this pregnancy overall. Weeks 6-10 were rough, mostly with overwhelming, couldn’t keep my eyes open, and could sleep for 15 hours fatigue. Otherwise, though, I’ve had very little nausea and am not gaining weight at the lightning speed that I feared. Sure, I know I’m only 15 weeks along so there’s a lot of weight to still be gained; but I wasn’t sure if carrying a second child that I had no control over genetically would cause this pregnancy to be dramatically different than my first. I feel like I’m eating enough for an army, though, so I’m certain the weight is going to start coming real quick. Everything I have a craving for is not something we ever have at home! What can I say? The baby likes salad, pizza and soft pretzels a lot!
I have just enough of a baby bump that people (such as co-workers) are cautiously starting to ask if I’m expecting and I am having a lot of the same questions come up from them: Is it your egg? Do you know the couple? Are you worried about giving up the baby? Is the couple coming here at all? Would you do this again? People are intrigued by this topic and find it fascinating, as I do, too. I almost feel like a unicorn – since I have a lot of people saying to me “I’ve heard of people doing that but never knew anyone who did.” Like I’m part of a mythical group of creatures that makes babies for families but you only ever hear about it and never meet one in person. It’s funny, actually, and opens up the conversation. I love hearing stories from people once I tell them I’m a surrogate, such as “I would’ve loved to do that but never could” or “My friend used a surrogate to build her family.” It’s really interesting to me to learn more about others’ experiences with surrogacy and their views on it.
I’m also so excited that as long as baby cooperates, the fathers will know the gender of their little one in just over a week! I’ve set up an early 3D/4D ultrasound as a gift to them to learn the gender and can’t wait to see their reaction to finding out what they are having via Skype! I remember lying in bed with my husband 2 ½ years ago, the day before we had our own gender scan and I remember the feeling of “this is the last night I’ll ever go to bed not knowing if I’m having a son or daughter. After tomorrow, I will know if I’m going to have a daddy’s girl or a momma’s boy” and to me, that changed everything. It made the pregnancy seem more real (as if the growing belly and tight pants didn’t do that already). I feel like a spectator in this pregnancy and I love it. I love getting to see the fathers reactions as their journey to parenthood unfolds before them. I secretly think they may be having a girl since this pregnancy is so similar to my own and I had a girl. I assume if it were a boy, I’d be worse off in the symptom department - but we shall see!
My family and friends continue to be great and super supportive. They are there when I’m being crabby (although that’s their word – not mine!), emotional, anxious or just not fun to be around. The fathers and I are emailing several times a week and just get along so well. So far, this pregnancy has been smooth sailing and I’m hopeful that it’ll stay that way. Until next time, you can find me in the grocery aisle at Target but definitely not in swim wear. I’ll avoid that section for now…
All Things Conceivable is a blog dedicated to sharing the knowledge and expert opinions of the dedicated team at ConceiveAbilities, a Chicago-based egg donation and surrogacy agency.